Civil War in 5,4,3........... "Now watch this drive".

Dosen't Jesus need a "Queer Eye" makeover?

So they got their Pearl Harbor. A agenda years in the making makes it to light. What's disgusting is how they use false patriotism and the memories of those killed on 9-11 to further their personal political ideology.

Do you feel safer? You shouldn't. For the sake of argument that the government was going to use this report to claim they are "winning the war on terrorism," but then had to revise it when it was found to be inaccurate. Then by the same argument it must be used to show that the "war on terrorism" has actually increased terrorist activity. Do you think that will happen?

So the administration is either lying or incompetent. More sad news for Ramones fans.

Could it have been the drug addiction? The "women secretly want to be sexually harrassed" statement? Distorting everything that is fact to fit your personal agenda? Or just being one of the biggest assholes in the world?

It seems everyone is looking at Ronald Reagan with rose-colored glasses at the moment and trying to re-write his political career. You would think by the coverage that it was all puppies, flowers and one-liners.It only seems appropriate that Bush would try to align himself with the Gipper. Let's see what another Reagan has to say. I like this guy.

Recently there have been articles stating,"A Team of administration lawyers concluded in a March 2003 legal memorandum that President Bush was not bound by either an international treaty prohibiting torture or a federal anti-torture law because he has the authority as commander in chief to approve any technique needed to protect the nation's security". But at the same time he has come out saying he is against torture. Then why would such a legal memorandum be necessary? Right now Bush is at the G-8 Summit telling other countries that they need to do more in Iraq. Why would anyone take seriously or meet with someone who feels that they are not bound by international treaties and laws?

I saw a homeless guy with a cell phone. If you live everywhere and I call you, haven't I just called you at home?

Ray Charles, R.I.P.

Got an email from Michael Moore. Yeah, we're tight. He wanted to let me know that Fahrenheit 9/11 now has a distributor and will be in your favorite theater by the end of the month. Oh, what fun will be. And speaking of fun, type "miserable failure" into Google and hit, "I'm feeling lucky." Coincidence?

Ahhh.... back and well rested.I didn't have to think much but here's a few things that crossed my mind.


20 things you have to believe to be a Republican today


1. Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an illness and you need our prayers for your recovery.

2. The United States should get out of the United Nations, and our highest national priority is enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq.

3. Government should relax regulation of Big Business and Big Money but crack down on individuals who use marijuana to relieve the pain of illness.

4. "Standing Tall for America"; means firing your workers and moving their jobs to India.

5. A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but multinational corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.

6. Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.

7. The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in speeches while slashing veterans' benefits and combat pay.

8. Group sex and drug use are degenerate sins unless you someday run for governor of California as a Republican.

9. If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex.

10. A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our longtime allies, then demand their cooperation and money.

11. HMOs and insurance companies have the interest of the public at heart.

12. Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy. Providing health care to all Americans is socialism.

13. Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but creationism should be taught in schools.

14. Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Bush's daddy made war on him, a good guy when Cheney did business with him and a bad guy when Bush needed a "we can't find Bin Laden" diversion.

15. A president lying about an extramarital affair is an impeachable offense. A president lying to enlist support for a war in which thousands die is solid defense policy.

16. Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet.

17. The public has a right to know about Hillary's cattle trades, but George Bush's driving record is none of our business.

18. You support states' rights, which means Attorney General John Ashcroft can tell states what local voter initiatives they have a right to adopt.

19. What Bill Clinton did in the 1960s is of vital national interest, but what Bush did in the '80s is irrelevant.

20. Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.